What Got You Here Won't Get You There

by Marshall Goldsmith (2007)

Reviewed by Marti Benjamin, MBA, CPC

Dr. Marshall Goldsmith is one of the best known executive coaches in America and was recently named by the American Management Association as one of the fifty great thinkers and business leaders that have impacted the field of management. In this book, he introduces us to the importance of working well with others, "It's my contention—and it's the bedrock thesis of this book—that interpersonal behavior is the difference-maker between being great and near-great, between getting the gold and settling for the bronze." (Page 120)

It's often easier to see how interpersonal skills are limiting the possibilities for others than to look at ourselves and tap into the information available to us about the impact we're having. We have probably all seen the achiever-type manager or executive who has climbed up the organization's hierarchy on the basis of accomplishments but no one can stand to work with him or her. They take great pride in their performance and have lost touch with what Goldsmith calls the inner compass of correct behavior and they are clueless about their position among their coworkers. That's the point that many of the world's largest and most successful companies call in a coach like Marshall Goldsmith, whose job it is to, "...help you consider the possibility that, despite your demonstrable success and laudable self-esteem, you might not be as good as you think you are; that all of us have corners in our behavioral makeup that are messy; and that these corners can be pinpointed and tidied up..." (Page 15)

Goldsmith delineates twenty habits that hold achievers from getting to the top. Do these habits sound like any you encounter? Or, are they habits you rely on to build your business success?

1. "Winning too much: The need to win at all costs and in all situations—when it matters, when it doesn't, and when it's totally beside the point.
   
   
2. Adding too much value: The overwhelming desire to add our two cents to every discussion.
   
   
3. Passing judgment: The need to rate others and impose our standards on them.
   
   
4. Making destructive comments: The needless sarcasm and cutting remarks that we think make us sound sharp and witty.
   
   
5. Starting with 'No,' But,' or 'However': The overuse of these negative qualifiers which secretly say to everyone, 'I'm right. You're wrong.'
   
   
6. Telling the world how smart we are: The need to show people we're smarter than they think we are.
   
   
7. Speaking when angry: Using emotional volatility as a management tool.
   
   
8. Negativity or 'Let me explain why that won't work': The need to share our negative thoughts even when we weren't asked.
   
   
9. Withholding information: The refusal to share information in order to maintain an advantage over others.
   
   
10. Failing to give proper recognition: The inability to praise and reward.
    
    
11. Claiming credit that we don't deserve: The most annoying way to overestimate our contribution to success.
    
    
12. Making excuses: The need to reposition our annoying behavior as a permanent fixture so people excuse us for it.
    
    
13. Clinging to the past: The need to deflect blame away from ourselves and onto events and people from our past; a subset of blaming everyone else.
    
    
14. Playing favorites: Failing to see that we are treating someone unfairly.
    
    
15. Refusing to express regret: The inability to take responsibility for our actions, admit we're wrong, or recognize how our actions affect others.
    
    
16. Not listening: The most passive-aggressive form of disrespect for colleagues.
    
    
17. Failing to express gratitude: The most basic form of bad manners.
    
    
18. Punishing the messenger: The misguided need to attack the innocent who are usually only trying to help us.
    
    
19. Passing the buck: The need to blame everyone but ourselves.
    
    
20. An excessive need to be 'me': Exalting our faults as virtues simply because they're who we are." (Page 40-41)
    
    

Did you recognize yourself in one or more of those habits? Goldsmith points out that none of us is immune to these habits and that does not make us a bad person. At the same time, our ability to recognize the habits we carry around with us and to see that they have a negative impact on others are not high; the chance that we'll take corrective action are even slimmer. After all, it appears to have worked so far!

The distinction between being an achiever and being a leader, according to Goldman, rests on the locus of focus: achievers focus on themselves—"their career, their performance, their progress, their needs…Successful people become great leaders when they learn to shift the focus from themselves to others." (Page 72)

The two factors at play with most of these interpersonal habits are information and emotion. Goldsmith recommends that when we are considering sharing either information or emotion, we stop to ask the questions: "Is it appropriate? How much should I convey?" (Page 109)

Marshall Goldsmith is perhaps best known in the coaching community for developing a process he calls Feedforward for helping derailing executives change their interpersonal habits. There are four steps to this process:

1. "Pick the one behavior that you would like to change which would make a significant, positive difference in your life…(e.g. becoming a good listener)
   
   
2. Describe this objective in a one-on-one dialogue with anyone you know...
   
   
3. Ask that person for two suggestions for the future that might help you achieve a positive change in your selected behavior...
   
   
4. Listen attentively to the suggestions. Take notes if you like. Your only ground rule: You are not allowed to judge, rate or critique the suggestions in any way...The only response you're permitted is, Thank you." (Page 171-172)
   
   

This process is then repeated with someone else and you keep doing so as long as people are providing you with ideas; you can choose later whether to accept or reject them.

Goldsmith describes some of the reasons people fail in their attempts to change:

1. Time: it takes longer than expected
   
   
2. Effort: it's harder than expected
   
   
3. Distractions: something comes up, a crisis of some sort, that prevents them from staying with their behavioral change plan
   
   
4. Rewards: they don't get the response they expected from their effort when the improvement begins
   
   
5. Maintenance: they forget that maintenance takes effort and requires sticking to the plan. (Page 188-189)
   
   

"If you want to succeed at goal setting, you have to face the reality of the effort and the payoff before you begin...Lasting goal achievement requires lots of time, hard work, personal sacrifice, ongoing effort, and dedication to the process that is maintained over years.' (Page 189) Is it worth it? It depends on where you want to go from here.

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©2007, Marti Benjamin